You may remember dating as a fun and exciting way to spend your Friday nights. But with a divorce behind you, the idea of getting out there and meeting new people seems far more intimidating than it did years ago. Figuring out where to start can be difficult, but the time has come to get your feet wet.
If you aren't yet over the loss of your ex -- or if you still cling to bitterness regarding how everything ended -- you won't be able to form a true connection with someone else, according to Terri Orbuch, relationship and family therapist, quoted in the Psych Central article, "6 Steps to Finding New Love." Work through the grief you are still experiencing from the divorce. Talk to friends, find a therapist and do what you need to do to become emotionally healthy and prepared for a new relationship.
Live Your Life
Look at this newly single phase of your life as a chance to pursue interests you wouldn’t have while married. Join a local running club or sign up to take art classes. Pursuing your interests will have a dual effect. Not only will it help increase your self-awareness and build confidence, but it will open doors for you to meet other adults who share similar interests.
Searching for other singles online allows you to build a foundation of emotional intimacy without dating stress. Spend time creating an online profile that reflects who you are and what you want in a relationship. Commit yourself to learning about other singles. Use this medium to combat the initial apprehension you may feel toward dating, while also increasing your chances of meeting the perfect match.
It is natural for fear and uncertainty to hold you back, but successful dating will require you to shed that apprehension and dive in head first, explains David Wygant, author and relationship coach, in the Huffington Post article, “5 Best Ways to Meet Men if You Are Over 35 and Divorced.” Now is the time to research all the potential places for meeting new people in your area. Challenge yourself to step outside your comfort zone. Look at dating as an opportunity to make new friends. Don’t become discouraged if you fail to find someone right away. Instead, revert back to the days of your youth when dating was a fun and exciting way to spend your Friday nights.