If you are married to an emotionally immature woman, chances are it is taking a toll on your relationship. You are probably facing problems ranging from intimacy to planning your future responsibly. An emotionally immature person is not able to express her emotions appropriately and is often self-destructive. Signs include low self-esteem, avoiding conversations and being perpetually late to events and meetings. Emotional immaturity can be rooted in a childhood experiences or the way your wife was treated, overall, in her youth.
Lack of Space
A wife who is emotionally immature has low self-esteem and issues with building confidence. She acts needy, overly jealous and dependent on you. She often physically places herself in your field of view for fear of being forgotten about if she is not constantly making herself a known presence. As her husband, you will likely not feel like you have any independence or freedom, and you certainly will not have free time or space to spend time with friends, engage in hobbies or even relax. You will feel like you only have time to pay attention to your wife, be affectionate and cater to her ego.
Avoiding important conversations by shutting down and not speaking or simply not being around when it is time to talk are signs of emotional immaturity. As a grown man, you want a spouse who will communicate with you openly and honestly. In a conversation with an emotionally immature wife, you will not feel like your concerns and opinions are being listened to and respected. If your wife is retreating or acting out, you may not even be able to begin a necessary conversation. You will never be able to get to the bottom of issues in your marriage or plan for the future.
Having an emotionally immature wife also has a ripple effect on your life outside your marriage. Being perpetually late to work, meetings and events is a sign of emotional immaturity. This sometimes stems from not getting enough sleep and oversleeping, which turns into a health issue for your wife. It may also simply be that she cannot budget her time well. Arriving late to work or missing meetings will negatively impact her job and cause financial issues in your marriage. Being late to major events, like weddings or holidays, puts a wedge between you and your family or friends.
Your emotionally immature wife may have a difficult time sticking to a schedule or a budget. This negatively affects how your household runs, as your wife will not be able to coordinate her work schedule with meals, taking care of the family pet or taking the kids to sports practice. She also may not be able to keep her spending within budget. Ditching her responsibilities puts stress on the marriage and makes you feel that you have to take care of everything in order for it to get done at all.
As a full-time writer in New York's Hudson Valley, Lindsay Pietroluongo's nightlife column and photos have appeared regularly in the "Poughkeepsie Journal" since 2007. Additional publications include "Chronogram," the "New Paltz Sojourn," "About Town" newspaper and "Outsider" magazine. Pietroluongo graduated from Marist College with a B.A. in English.