You love sports and you love your girlfriend, and you don't want to give up either one. Finding a balance that helps you maintain your relationship with your girlfriend and indulge in sports can be tricky. How you manage to hold on to both of your passions depends in part on your girlfriend's characteristics and preferences. The rest is up to you.
Help her feel good about being your girlfriend. When she feels important to you, she is more likely to accept or even encourage you to enjoy yourself with sports. In his book, "Communication Miracles for Couples: Easy and Effective Tools to Create More Love and Less Conflict," Jonathan Robinson says all human beings are the same at the core, with a need for acknowledgment, appreciation and acceptance. When you tell her what you like and appreciate about her, you make deposits in her emotional bank account, giving her a sense of security in your relationship. When she feels secure, she is less likely to feel a need to compete for your attention.
Include your girlfriend in your sports activities when you can. Whether by playing, watching or attending a sports function, women can enjoy sports and competitive activities, too. Engaging in sports together can enhance your relationship and gives you a chance to spend time with both your passions. In "Achieving an Optimal Work-Life Balance: Dating in Graduate School," David Kille states ". . . couples who engage in a novel and arousing activity together can have a positive impact on one’s relationship and alleviate boredom. . .Try to fit in a new leisure activity or sport that you do together. . ."
Share information with her about teams and players. Use online videos, movies or magazine articles to familiarize her with your favorites. When you help her build an emotional connection and enthusiasm, she might even become as avid a sports fan as you are.
Spend time with your girlfriend doing things of her choice on a regular basis. Reciprocity is important to relationship maintenance. You can gain even more points if you find ways to show enthusiasm as you take time to participate in her favorite hobbies, even if those include shopping, gardening or watching romantic movies. Turn about is fair play, as they say.
- American Psychological Association: Achieving an Optimal Work-Life Balance: Dating in Grade School
- Communication Miracles for Couples: Easy and Effective Tools to Create More Love and Less Conflict; Jonathan Robinson
- Inspired Commitment: Emotional Connection, What It Is and Why It Matters
- Family Therapy; Michael P. Nichols and Richard C. Schwartz
For Judy Kilpatrick, gardening is the best mental health therapy of all. Combining her interests in both of these fields, Kilpatrick is a professional flower grower and a practicing, licensed mental health therapist. A graduate of East Carolina University, Kilpatrick writes for national and regional publications.
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