How to Get Over a Broken Heart from Infidelity

by Heather Savant

Infidelity is possible in any relationship and can involve the man cheating on the woman or vice versa. Infidelity occurs for different reasons at different times. It can occur after the first year or in years five or seven of a relationship, also known as the seven-year itch. Other times infidelity can occur are after the birth of a child or during a midlife crisis. Either way, infidelity is painful for all those involved especially for the person being cheated on, but infidelity can be overcome.

Take Care of Yourself

Eat healthily and take a multivitamin to keep your body's immunity level high. Depression and stress can weaken a person's immunity level, which can lead to illness.

Exercise if you are physically capable. Exercise can help to reduce stress and increase a person's ability to cope due to endorphins that are released during exercise. Endorphins are naturally occurring chemicals that are released by the pituitary gland into the body's nervous system. The negative effects of stress that make it difficult for a person to cope are greatly reduced as a result of their release.

See a counselor or therapist who has experience with relationship issues. A counselor is a non-biased person to whom you can safely express your feelings without being or feeling judged. Counselors help provide the necessary tools for overcoming the pain caused by infidelity.

Write your feelings, thoughts and experiences in a journal or diary each day. This is a way for you to take control of what you are feeling in a productive manner. A journal can also provide you with evidence of growth over time which is a self-esteem booster.

Spend time with close family or friends. Your family and friends can provide you with strong emotional support. Be choosy on whom you decide to tell about your partner's infidelity. You do not need to tell everyone about the infidelity, as this may increase your stress and give your partner the attention she's craving, even if the attention is negative.

Enjoy life and make your own happiness. Find a new hobby or re-visit an old one. You are in charge of your feelings and what you allow to affect them. See yourself as being happy, and you will become what you've imagined -- happy.

Healing Together

Seek couples counseling for you and your partner to attend. There is a reason behind your partner's infidelity, and couples counseling can help you identify the reason and how to avoid it in the future.

Show your partner that you want to trust him in small steps. Start with trusting him with knowing how you are feeling today. In time you can start to trust him in other areas in your relationship, such as paying a bill on time. Encouraging your partner to tell you honestly his daily plans can also help improve your trust if he is willing to do this.

Give each other time and forgiveness. Don't bring up past issues that have already been dealt with to make your partner feel worse than she already feels. The guilt she feels feel is one of the worse punishments she will have to endure. As you forgive your partner as shown by increasing trust and being non-judgmental, she will begin to forgive herself and learn from her bad choice.

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  • There is no cure for a broken heart. There is no set time limit that states when your heart will heal. Every person is different and will taken different amounts of time to heal from infidelity. Before you can heal, you have to realize that you did not commit the infidelity. Your partner did. But together, if you are willing, you can rebuild your relationship and make it stronger.

About the Author

Heather Savant has written professionally since 2008. She currently writes for the Virginia Gardener website in addition to contributing articles to various other online outlets. She published a poem in the book "A Question of Balance" in 1992. Savant holds a bachelor's degree in human services counseling from Old Dominion University.