How to Make Your Relationship Work When He Works Out of Town

By: Chris Brower

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Relationships become challenging when one of the partners works out of town. Perhaps it’s a short-term assignment for a couple months, or maybe he's working permanently in another town until he can find something closer to you. Whatever the case, this can create problems as he spends most or all of his week in a different place, away from you. Through trust, regular communication and reminders of the value of your relationship, you can overcome some of the difficulties of this situation and keep your relationship happy and healthy.

Step 1

Communicate regularly. Discuss how often you’d like to communicate and stick to that plan. This could include a daily phone call. If you like, establish a specific time for your call and urge each other not to make other plans during that time.

Step 2

Use video chat. Talking regularly is important, but seeing each other is important too, even if you can’t be in the same room. If you have computers that are video-chat capable, use them to your advantage.

Step 3

Schedule visits if he will be out of town for an extended period. Always having a visit scheduled keeps both people excited and more comfortable in the relationship. Don’t just say, “I’ll come visit sometime.” Say instead, “I’ll visit you in six weeks.” Likewise, if he’s able to visit you, switch off who visits whom.

Step 4

Trust each other. Hopefully by this time you’ve built up trust in the relationship. To continue this while he’s out of town, be open about your life and activities and urge him to be forthcoming too. If you’re unsure whether spending time with another person is appropriate or not, ask your partner before doing so. Keep in regular contact and stick to your communication commitments. If either of you stops answering the phone or is reluctant to talk about what you’re doing, trust problems can arise.

Step 5

Mail presents to each other. This gives each person something to look forward to, and can make for a nice surprise. These presents act as reminders of your love for each other.

Step 6

Take up other hobbies and interests. If you’re used to spending a lot of time with your partner and he’s no longer around regularly, it can leave a huge void in your life. Instead of sitting at home feeling sad, take up new hobbies and interests to make the most of your time alone. Connect with old friends and family members. Learn a musical instrument, how to cook or how to speak a foreign language. It’ll give you and your partner more to talk about in your daily chats and keep you busy and fulfilled.