With approximately half of all marriages in the United States ending in divorce, many men will wind up back on the dating scene. If you've ever scoured a man's left hand for a tan line where his wedding ring used to be and come up empty, there are more reliable methods. Divorced men actually do demonstrate several signs that are possible to observe without employing the services of a detective.
If the divorce was amicable or if he has no children, you may hear little or nothing about a divorced man's ex-wife. If there was or is ongoing animosity, however, his ex-wife may become a third party in your relationship, whether you ever actually meet her or not. This is especially true if there are children involved. You don't have to become best friends with a man's ex-wife, but you should try to develop a cordial relationship with her, advises Rhonda Findling, author of "The Dating Cure," quoted by Match.com's Happen magazine.
Especially if the divorce is recent, a divorced man may not yet be over his ex-wife. "He’ll talk excessively about the marriage, ex-wife, or divorce, frequently praise or badmouth his ex, and spend more time with the ex than is necessary for children or polite friendship," warns Dr. Christie Hartman, author of "Dating the Divorced Man: Sort Through the Baggage to Decide if He’s Right for You," quoted on MSN. A man who is newly divorced may be especially eager to find a new relationship to fill the void left by the departure of his wife, Hartman warns, writing on her website. Once he has healed, he may dump the girlfriend who has offered him emotional support. Other men may adopt a "kid in the candy store" mentality, engaging in numerous short-term liaisons, according to Match.com's Happen magazine.
Constricted Time and Finances
If a divorced man has children, he may have limited availability for dates because of visitation schedules or child care obligations. He may also have a financial obligation to support his ex-wife, their children or both, which leaves less discretionary spending to pursue a new relationship, Match.com's Happen explains. Be prepared to be flexible, the magazine recommends.
A divorced man may also keep you way from his children during the early stages of your relationship. "Children become easily attached, and you don't want to disappoint or hurt them if things don't work out," explains relationship expert Gilda Carle, Ph.D., author of "Don't Bet on the Prince! How to Have the Man You Want by Betting on Yourself," quoted by Match.com's Happen magazine. Once the relationship becomes serious, however, his children may become a regular part of your dating routine.
Chris Blank is an independent writer and research consultant with more than 20 years' experience. Blank specializes in social policy analysis, current events, popular culture and travel. His work has appeared both online and in print publications. He holds a Master of Arts in sociology and a Juris Doctor.