How to Ignore a Ranting & Raving Husband

by Erin Schreiner

Some husbands let things roll off their backs, while others respond to upset by ranting and raving, a process that generally makes everyone around them miserable. If your husband is a rant and raver, you may feel at the mercy of his moods. Instead of allowing his emotional de-stress-- and poor response -- to lead you to experience your own upset, learn to ignore his periods of ranting and keep yourself, and potentially your children sane.

Tell him how you feel about the ranting and raving before he begins to do so. If your husband has a pattern of ranting and raving, discuss the issue with him when he is not in the midst of one of his tantrums. Without attacking him, tell him that you understand that he gets upset, but when he goes off the hook he has a negative impact on everyone in the family. By telling him this when he is level-headed enough to hear it, you may be able to influence his future behavior.

Ask your spouse to take a breather. If you notice your husband starting to get upset, suggest that perhaps he should head out for a walk, go to the driving range and hit some golf balls or head outside and do some yard work. By doing this, you can increase the likelihood that he calms down naturally without going into a ranting and raving fit..

Escape the situation temporarily. Instead of staying in the same house as your spouse while he goes through his period of upset, get away for a bit. Head out to the mall, taking the kids with you, or venture out to lunch with some girlfriends while you leave him at home to get over it.

Discuss the issue post rant. If your husband's rants are commonly caused by the same things, try tackling these subjects. For example, if your husband tends to rant about the behavior of the neighbors, talk about the issue with him after he has cooled down. With your support, he may be better able to see that his ranting is counter-productive.

Help your spouse devise coping methods. Your husband may rant and rave because he doesn't know of a better way to deal with his upset. If you believe that this may be the case, help him overcome this problem by sitting down with him and creating a list of things that he could do instead of carrying on. He may, for example, find it beneficial to keep a diary of his emotions into which he can write instead of going off the handle. By doing this, you can likely reduce the amount of time he spends in an emotional tizzy, making handling this challenging situation easier for you.

About the Author

Erin Schreiner is a freelance writer and teacher who holds a bachelor's degree from Bowling Green State University. She has been actively freelancing since 2008. Schreiner previously worked for a London-based freelance firm. Her work appears on eHow, and RedEnvelope. She currently teaches writing to middle school students in Ohio and works on her writing craft regularly.

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