Identify the issues. This will take being honest about what issues exist even if they are unpleasant. Identifying what is broken gives you direct evidence of what needs to be fixed. Not only will you be able to begin fixing the problem once it is identified, but you will also save time by avoiding investing in fruitless effort.

Avoid placing blame. Placing blame unless it is on yourself, will only cause the situation to become worse between you and your girlfriend. When a person is forced to take responsibility for a bad situation, it will often make them jump to the defensive standpoints of their personality. After your girlfriend is on the defensive, it will be harder to make ground in fixing things with her.

Engage in honest communication. Talk about what is wrong and work through your problems together. Refrain from climbing in your shell of emotions and refusing to allow her in. Your girlfriend is more likely to admire your effort to talk and follow your lead if you are being honest about your emotions without being offensive.

Buy her a gift. Although you can’t buy your way out of every problem, gifts will soften your girlfriend’s heart to listen to your sincere apology. A good rule of thumb is to not only get her something she likes, but to upgrade your gift idea equal to the situation you are trying to fix. For instance, taking your girlfriend out for fast food may not be the best gift or way to apologize for a deep betrayal.

Listen to what she wants. After you have spent some time finding out what is wrong, don’t be too quick to start fixing things that you fail to do what your girlfriend wants. Often, a girlfriend who wants to work things out will give you hints to what it will take to make things up to her. Pay ample attention to what she wants, whether it is communicated verbally, through body language or other ways, take the hint and act on it as quickly as possible.