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How to Make an Old Relationship Feel Like New

by Joshua Duvauchelle

It's only natural that the initial excitement and passion in a marriage or long-term relationship fades a little after the "honeymoon phase" is over. But if left too long on its own, those smouldering relationship coals could turn into a pile of cold ashes. Take steps today to reignite the passionate flame between you and your partner, and don't let routines, family busyness or work get in the way. With the right strategies, you can make your old relationship feel new and exciting once again.

You're Not Too Cool for School

Researchers at Brigham Young University suggest recreational learning as a way to "renew" your long-term relationships. For example, sign yourself and your partner up for a dance class or a cooking lesson with a chef. Trying something new together can enhance your romance, strengthen your relationship bond as you work together to accomplish a goal as a couple and give you a new topic to talk about when you're alone. It also can show you an exciting, new aspect of your partner or your relationship that you didn't know was even there.

Spontaneity Is Sexy

If you've been together for a long time, it's easy to fall into a day-to-day routine, but boredom can often be bad for a relationship. Bust out of the rut to break into a new, spicy chapter in your relationship. Switching up your routine is a sure-fire way to ignite more passion, even if it's something small such as changing who normally calls a restaurant for reservations. Additional options include skipping work together to spend a cozy morning in bed or surprising your spouse with roses or a small gift for no specific reason. Or, go one step further and surprise your mate with a trip.

Start Dating Again

It's common for people in long-term relationships to slowly stop dating, often because career and family sucks up too much time. Yet this basic, core component of your initial time together is key to keeping the romance sizzling. Create space in your schedule to go on dates again, with marriage book author Jim Burns recommending 1.5 hours of dating per week as the magic number. And make sure it's just you two. While double dates with other couples may be fun, you want intimate one-on-one time with your partner to really rekindle the romance.

Hit the Chat Room

Spend a few minutes every single day to talk about your day, how you're feeling and what you appreciate about each other. Regular communication is crucial for maintaining a strong, healthy and passionate relationship. It keeps you feeling connected, both emotionally and spiritually. Regular communication also can help prevent relationship conflicts, which are a quick way to kill the romantic spark.

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