Whether he’s your brother or your love interest, a moody guy can make you rethink your relationship. You might feel as if you are walking on eggshells when he’s around, as any miscommunication could set him off into explosive anger. While you can’t always hope to control his mood swings, you can change the way you react to them and create a healthier relationship by doing so.
Maintain a Positive Mindset
If you allow another person's mood to drag you down, not only do you sacrifice your own sense of well-being, you also risk straining the relationship. For example, responding to his rude insults with more insults will drive you apart. Instead, aim to maintain a positive mood during your interactions with the moody man, suggests certified Myers Briggs Type Indicator practitioner Vlad Rapoport in the article, "Learning How to Deal with Moody People.” If you feel your mood slipping, excuse yourself from the situation and practice deep breathing until you feel calmer.
Leave You Out of It
Don't take the man's words personally, suggests Rapoport. It's probable that he was already in a bad mood, and you just happened to be one of many targets of the mood swing. Take his insults and glares with a grain of salt, and realize he is responsible for his own emotions. By acknowledging this, you not only increase the chances of maintaining your own positive mood, but you also allow room for empathetic communication.
Men have a tendency to withdraw feelings and, rather than admit the true source of anger, redirect their frustrations onto other matters, suggests psychotherapist Terry Real in Molly Fahner's article "How to Deal with a Moody Man." Replace questions such as "Do you want to talk about it?" with more specific ones, such as "Did something happen at work today?" The goal is to be specific enough to lead him to open up and be vulnerable.
Draw a Line
Take of a tally of his mood swings and how often he aims his negative emotions at you, suggests Real. If they occur too often, or if you find that you are frequently his emotional punching bag, don’t be afraid to speak your mind and create the necessary distance. Understand that there is a time to be compassionate and there is a time for self-preservation. You might want to suggest counseling, such as anger management, to him as you take a temporary break from his presence.
Mitch Reid has been a writer since 2006. He holds a fine arts degree in creative writing, but has a persistent interest in social psychology. He loves train travel, writing fiction, and leaping out of planes. His written work has appeared on sites such as Synonym.com and GlobalPost, and he has served as an editor for ebook publisher Crescent Moon Press, as well as academic literary journals.
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