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How to Be Open Emotionally With Men Without Getting Hurt

by Kristen Moutria, studioD

Being emotionally open with men is a scary task that many women do not feel they are able to do. Fear of getting hurt can be crippling. And after previous heartbreak, many women may not feel like they even have the ability to be vulnerable anymore. It is not truly possible to enter into a relationship with no risk of getting hurt; however, certain steps can be taken to lower the likelihood of emotional pain.

Take Your Time

As you are getting to know a new man, take your time as you self-disclose. There is no need to rush a relationship, and the sooner you tell him everything about yourself, the sooner he is likely to lose interest. Instead, reveal more and more about yourself with each date, being careful not to say more than you are comfortable with. Being gradual with the information you share will leave mystery in the air, as well as lower your risks of walking away with terrible heartbreak.

Focus on Him

If you are afraid of getting hurt by the man you are dating, try focusing on him to take the attention off you. Ask him questions about himself, such as what his interests are, different life experiences he has had and what he believes in. You will not feel as pressured to talk about yourself, and he will enjoy the attention he is getting from you. If he is truly a man worth spending time with, he will eventually want to know the same things about you. This way, you can be emotionally open with him while knowing that he truly is interested in what you are telling him.

Beware of His Reputation

If the man you are dating has a reputation for cheating on girls or being a "player," it is best not to get involved with him at all. Being emotionally open with this kind of man is simply not possible. By thinking that you have the power to change him or that you are the one girl he will not cheat on, you are setting yourself up for heartbreak. Before you even date someone, make sure you know a little bit about the guy you are about to spend time with. It will spare you heartbreak and regret in the long run.

Let Your Guard Down

When you decide that enough time has passed and it is the right moment, gradually let your guard down. You may drive a man away if you are completely invulnerable, and this will cause emotional pain. The point of being careful when it comes to getting to know a man is not to be numb but to be wise and avoid heartbreak that is completely unnecessary. Letting your guard down is eventually necessary to grow close to a man and build a lasting relationship.

About the Author

Kristen Moutria has a Bachelor of Arts in psychology from Evangel University. She is currently pursuing her Master of Arts in education from the University of Nebraska.

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