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How to Avoid Getting My Heart Broken

by Kristen Moutria

Relationships are risky, and many people are afraid of having their heart broken. The only true way to avoid having your heart broken is to avoid love in the first place. The next best solution is to be careful in relationships, making sure that you open your heart slowly and cautiously, without keeping your guard up too much. When you find the right mate, feelings of brokenheartedness will become a memory.

Date Carefully

Be careful whom you date or you may be destined to end up with a broken heart. Some people are interested only in using others; some have intentions that are impure. If you decide to date a person who is known to be a "player," for example, there is a good chance that person will break up with you after getting physical satisfaction -- leaving you with a broken heart and painful regret. Date people with good reputations.

Date Before Labeling the Relationship

Going on dates before deciding to be in a relationship is a way to avoid getting your heart broken. Instead of being quick to label your relationship with the other person, spend some casual time doing fun activities together, such as dining out, walking in the park or going bowling. These lightweight dates will help you determine if your date is a good fit or if a more serious relationship is not in cards.

Do Not Fully Self-Disclose on the First Date

Do not tell your date everything about yourself the first time you get together -- or the second, or the third. It is important to be slow and tactful when it comes to disclosing information about yourself, because you do not know yet if you can trust the person you are dating. Instead, reveal insignificant details about yourself in the beginning stages of the relationship. If your date proves trustworthy, you may choose to be more open with the details of your life as the relationship progresses.

Set Boundaries

Set boundaries in the relationships you develop. Although it may seem like a fun idea to become intimate with the person you met three hours ago at the bar, setting a boundary and deciding not to get too close to someone you do not know well will serve you better in the long run. Instead of spending five hours talking on the phone, like you might feel like doing, keep the mystery going and talk for only fifteen minutes. If you and this person are meant to be, the relationship will develop eventually and your heart may not get broken.

Open Up Your Heart

Open up your heart -- eventually. Keeping yourself closed off may drive away the person you are dating if you are too closed off for a long period of time. You must find a balance between disclosing information about yourself and keeping certain things private as time passes and trust builds. Slowly but surely opening up your heart will allow you to feel intimacy and gauge if the relationship is going anywhere.

About the Author

Kristen Moutria has a Bachelor of Arts in psychology from Evangel University. She is currently pursuing her Master of Arts in education from the University of Nebraska.

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