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How to Keep a Guy Interested Without Being a Doormat

by C. Giles, studioD

You're really into your new guy, and he seems to like you, too. You may have asked friends for advice on how to keep him interested, but you may still be confused about what to do. Naturally, you want to maintain his interest in you, but you also don't want to come across as desperate so he thinks he can treat you like a doormat. While it's always best just to be yourself, you can also use a few tried-and-tested dating tricks to strike the right balance and make him want more.

Who's That Girl?

You may be tempted to reveal everything about yourself to your new guy. But in the early stages of your relationship, it's better to hold back a little. This will make you appear mysterious and slightly out of his grasp, which can be extremely attractive. Most men like a challenge. Make sure he knows that you had a busy, exciting life before he came along, and still do now. It will require a certain amount of self-control, but if you don't always agree to his suggestions, he won't think you're willing to drop everything to spend time with him.

Make Him Wait

In this age of digital communication and social media, it's easy to maintain constant contact with a guy. But as much as you want to text him as soon as you wake up each day or leave cute comments on his social media sites, it will be better for you in the long run if you play it cool. Text only occasionally and wait a short time before responding to any messages from him. Always reply, so that he knows you're interested, but don't make him think you're just sitting around waiting to hear from him. He'll find you more interesting if he's not quite sure when you'll be in touch.

Games Can Be Good

In the early stages of a relationship, playing hard to get a little bit can be harmless. It's a well-known dating strategy that often works well, says professor of philosophy Aaron Ben-Zeév in the article "Is It Worth Playing Hard to Get?" for "Psychology Today." To make it work in your favor, switch from being flirtatious to appearing not quite so interested. Take care not to play it so cool that he comes to the conclusion you're not interested at all.

Watch Your Mouth

It's a great feeling when you realize you're in love with a guy, and it's natural to want to reveal your feelings to him. However, early on in the relationship, this could be a recipe for disaster. Show you are interested in your guy by complimenting him and letting him know how much you enjoy your time together, but save the "L" word for a later stage. If you declare undying love for him too soon, he may stop making as much effort with you, think he can take you for granted or even be scared off altogether.

About the Author

C. Giles is a writer with an MA (Hons) in English literature and a post-graduate diploma in law. Her work has been published in several publications, both online and offline, including "The Herald," "The Big Issue" and "Daily Record."

Photo Credits

  • Michael Blann/Digital Vision/Getty Images