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How to Tell If Your Boyfriend Fell Out of Love With You

by Becky Swain , studioD

It can be difficult to face the possibility that your feelings for your boyfriend are no longer returned, and even harder for you to validate your doubts. Your emotional development is not static, and relationships often reflect the ongoing change and growth that take place throughout adulthood. The same holds true for your boyfriend, so if your instincts tell you that something is amiss in your relationship with him, pay attention to signs that your boyfriend may no longer be in love with you.

Disappearing Act

Disconnecting from you represents a red flag that problems exist in your relationship with your boyfriend, according to counselor Stephanie Sarkis in the "Psychology Today" article “Seven Signs You’re Headed for a Breakup.” Making excuses to not spend time with you is an obvious attempt to disconnect, but don’t ignore more subtle signs. For example, perhaps your boyfriend took care to stay in touch in the past when you were apart through sweet texts or delighted you with little gifts when you didn’t expect them. If the texts and gifts disappear, your boyfriend may soon disappear as well.

He's Not Talking

Honest communication sustains successful relationships. Small differences in opinion that result in heated arguments may signal that your boyfriend no longer wishes to maintain an open, caring line of communication with you. Or, perhaps communication is almost nonexistent, and you are on the receiving end of deafening silence. If you have little knowledge about what is going on in your boyfriend’s daily life because he longer communicates, he actually may be communicating that he wants to exclude you from his life.

He's Not the Same Guy

Inconsistency or changes in your boyfriend’s behavior may mirror changes in his feelings for you. If you are frequently left wondering where your once-dependable boyfriend is, it may indicate that he enjoys spending time with someone else. Similarly, if he suddenly seems jumpy when receiving phone calls or texts, there may be reason to question your boyfriend’s commitment to your relationship, according to counselor Elly Prior in the article, "Infidelity Warning Signs: The Signs of a Cheating Spouse or Partner" on Professional-Counselling.com. Do not ignore sudden changes in your boyfriend’s dress or a renewed obsession with his appearance.

He Stops Playing Footsie

Affection and intimacy are components of a loving relationship, and it’s natural for the frequency and intensity of intimacy to ebb and flow. Couples display affection, nurture their connection and diffuse tension through physical contact. However, the complete absence of physical contact can signify problems in the relationship with your boyfriend, Sarkis says.

About the Author

Becky Swain's first publication appeared in the "Journal of Personality Assessment" in 1984. Her articles have also appeared on various websites. She is an adjunct college instructor, licensed school psychologist and educational consultant. She holds a Master of Science in clinical psychology and a Doctor of Philosophy in educational psychology, both from Mississippi State University.

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