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How to Know if an Old Crush Still Has Feelings for You

by Nina Edwards

Knowing if your old crush has completely moved on can be the difference between making a fool of yourself by assuming he still wants you or putting this relationship behind you. However, it’s not easy to figure out his feelings, because of the constant mixed messages. If you pay close attention to his behaviors, though, you can figure out where he stands.

Your Expectations

Even if you realize that your old crush wants you back, will you do anything about it? How will that knowledge make you feel? Be honest with yourself – are you looking for answers to calm your curiosity or you are hoping for a new beginning? Probably, you will feel depressed after a breakup, so make sure this knowledge is not affecting your judgment, as explained by Jack Mearns in an article entitled, “Coping with a breakup: Negative mood regulation expectancies and depression following the end of a romantic relationship,” published in the “Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.”

Dating Others

One of the biggest hints that your ex crush is still into you is that he is not dating other women. If a lot of time has passed since you two dated and he is still single, he’s probably too hurt to move on. However, that doesn’t necessarily imply he would like to get back with you. If he’s that hurt, he might be wary of opening his wounds again.

You're on His Speed Dial

He wants to stay friends with you after a breakup and calls you more often than your best girlfriends do. If those conversations sound awkward or involve long silences where he holds the phone and simply listens to you breathe, take notice. That is definitely not a behavior of a regular friend. If he tries to drag the conversation out, you can be confident that he still has feelings for you.

Sweet Memories

Does your ex keep reminding you of all the times and places where you used to go together? If he constantly brings up old memories, he’s probably trying to make you relive those moments and the old emotions. Before you do, you should know that depression and boredom aren’t good advisors, as described in “Five Reasons Not to Get Back With an Ex," on YourTango.com website. There is a reason why your relationship didn’t work the first time and that reason hasn’t magically disappeared just because you might be feeling lonely at the moment.

About the Author

Nina Edwards holds a doctorate in clinical psychology and has been writing about families and relationships since 2000. She has numerous publications in scholarly journals and often writes for relationship websites as well. Edwards is a university lecturer and practicing psychologist in New York City.

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