You don't need to feel like a helpless onlooker during your wife's pregnancy. After all, it's your baby she's carrying -- and you can do a lot to make the experience a positive one for both of you. You may not be able to take away your wife's morning sickness or heartburn, but you can certainly do your bit to make her feel good about herself during this life-changing time.
"Darling, You're Beautiful"
Your wife may not be feeling her best during her pregnancy. Weight gain is a certainty. She might also be unhappy about some of the side effects of pregnancy, like swollen ankles, varicose veins, hair in unexpected places, swollen breasts and stretch marks. Keep in mind that not all expectant moms experience that elusive pregnancy "glow," warns the KidsHealth website. Make your wife feel better about her changing body by telling her how beautiful she is. Let her moan and groan to you about her insecurities -- and then reassure her that you love and desire her more than ever.
Regular thoughtful gestures will go a long way toward making your wife feel good about herself during her pregnancy. Arrange for some treats to show her just how much you appreciate her major role in the baby-making process. A pampering day at a local spa will help her relax. Draw a warm bath with some soothing -- and pregnancy safe -- bath oil, and then light candles around the bathroom. Cook her a meal from scratch, including all her favorite dishes. Send her flowers, give her jewelry -- or anything else that she loves to let her know how much you love her.
Patience Will Pay Off
However apprehensive you might be about the arrival of your baby, don't forget that it's your wife who has to carry the baby for 40 weeks, and then go through labor and delivery. Bear this in mind when she's suffering from mood swings, spending a small fortune on adorable baby clothes and nursery accessories, and being particularly stubborn about baby name choices. Instead of complaining, support what she's doing and make sure she knows that she can lean on you when she's feeling apprehensive herself about what's to come. Provide a listening ear and open arms if she needs to have a good cry.
Affection and Intimacy
When it comes sex during pregnancy, let your wife's desires -- or lack thereof -- be your guide. Understand that no two women and no to pregnancies are the same. Your wife may be more interested in sex than normal, not interested in sex at all, or her libido may peak and trough depending on the stage of her pregnancy, notes the BabyCenter website. If she's keen to get intimate, you know what to do. If she's not, be caring and affectionate without trying to change her mind. Knowing that you respect her wishes will make her feel less anxious about her lack of a sex drive.
C. Giles is a writer with an MA (Hons) in English literature and a post-graduate diploma in law. Her work has been published in several publications, both online and offline, including "The Herald," "The Big Issue" and "Daily Record."