Dealing with addiction is never easy -- and watching someone you love succumb to drug abuse can be incredibly scary and painful. You likely already know that you can’t force someone to change addictive behaviors, but because you care about your boyfriend, it's natural that you want to find a way to help him get sober. With a support team and the right plan, getting your boyfriend clean might be a possibility.
Connect with other friends and family members to plan an intervention. Interventions can show people how much they're loved and provide them with an opportunity to receive help, notes MayoClinic.com. Find a specialist to guide the intervention in a healthy and helpful manner.
Write down a few words to share with your boyfriend when you confront him with your concerns. Explain how much you love him, and how his behavior has affected your life up to this point. Declare your hopes for the future concerning the two of you -- and describe why it is important for him to get sober to fulfill those dreams.
Set ground rules. Your boyfriend needs to know that people in his life aren't going to continue putting up with his drug use. Make it clear that if he doesn’t make an effort to quit, you will no longer be able to remain together.
Avoid neglecting your own needs. Find your own support system, suggests Helpguide.org. Remember that you can’t help your boyfriend if you become so caught up in his drug abuse that you stop taking care of yourself.
Listen to your boyfriend when he needs to talk or is struggling with wanting to use. Visit him in rehab, should he choose to go, and continue acting as his sounding board once he gets out. Remain available for him to call when the urge to use again strikes.
Try to be a friend instead of an enforcer. People accept help more readily when that help is offered from a friendly and understanding place, notes the Novus Medical Detox Center website. Make sure your boyfriend knows you want to help without wanting to control him.
Encourage him in the path to recovery. Attend meetings with your boyfriend and talk to him about the steps in his recovery program if he chooses to enter one. Become an active participant in his getting and staying clean.
Stick to the ground rules you set during the intervention period, and walk away if it becomes clear that he isn’t giving up his drugs. It is possible that tough love may be exactly what he needs to change his mind and get clean.
- Don’t blame yourself if he refuses to quit. Remember that you tried your best and that he has to be the one to want to make a change.
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