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How to Know He Won't Marry You

by Sarah McLeod

There comes a time in every man's life when he feels ready to settle down. At that time, his actions, thoughts and life goals will differ from those of his youth. When he finds a mate with whom he wants to share his life in marriage, he will exercise all of his best traits -- such as love, protection, generosity and openness -- to win her heart and hand. If your boyfriend does not express these virtues in his behavior, he is not ready to be a loving, devoted husband.

Make note of the schedule your boyfriend keeps. Does he still frequent after-hour spots, nightclubs, strip clubs and bars? Most men who are ready to marry lose interest in going to the singles-oriented places they frequented during their youth. If he still hangs out with silly, drunken friends, he is probably not ready to marry.

Bring up children in a conversation. Tell him you would like to have a baby and note his response. Men who have been thinking of marriage usually think of having a child as well. If he is totally averse to the idea, he is probably not ready to wed.

Look around. Are half of your belongings in his closet or bedroom drawers? Do you have a key to his place? If the answer to these questions is a resounding no, your boyfriend is probably not ready to make room for you in his life.

Pay attention to how he spends his money. Large purchases for items that only he will enjoy like a two-seater sports car or expensive men's jewelry are usually primary indicators that a man is not ready to marry because he is not ready to share.

Listen to him. He probably drops verbal hints all the time about his true feelings about marriage. If he refers to marriage or married people as stupid, he does not want to marry. Also, if he tells you flat out that he is not the marrying type, cut your ties and stop wasting your time if marriage is your heart's desire.

Review the course of your relationship. Do you spend extended time together during vacations or trips to unfamiliar places? These kinds of trips strengthen a relationship because they create an atmosphere of reliance. If he is not ready for this closeness, he is not ready to wed.

Pay attention to your feelings when you are with him, not just your desires. How does he make you feel? Does he criticize you, make you cry or disrespect you? If he does not appreciate your flaws, he is not ready to form a lasting relationship.

About the Author

Sarah McLeod began writing professionally for the federal government In 1999. In 2002 she was trained by Georgetown University's Oncology Chief to abstract medical records and has since contributed to Phase I through Phase IV research around the country. McLeod holds a Bachelor of Arts in human services from George Washington University and a Master of Science in health science from Touro University.

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