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Top Three Most Important Attributes in a Relationship Partner

by Kimberly Liby, studioD

Not everyone wants or seeks the same attributes in a partner, however, the most important attributes are those that are less superficial and solely based on connecting with your partner. What makes them important attributes is how these qualities enhance you as an individual, which by default, increases the value of the relationship as a whole.


Being honest and doing the right thing, even when no one is looking, is the pinnacle of integrity; it's also about having good morals and ethics. There's nothing worse than entering a relationship with someone that's based on a lie or facade. How do people talk about your partner? Do they say nice things? Consider the fact that anything your partner says or does reflects on you, and therefore, your character, so it's important that your partner has honorable traits.


Your partner should always respect you, both in public and in private. How your partner speaks to you and treats you says a lot about the state of the relationship because it manifests your partner's level of respect for you. Respect implies that your partner loves and admires you for your abilities, qualities and achievements. Clinical psychologist Lisa Firestone explains respect in her article, "Seven Qualities of an Ideal Partner." Firestone says ideal partners value each others' interests separate from their own. They support one another in their life goals without trying to control or change each other through threats or manipulative behavior.


Being able to give and receive affection is an important attribute in a partner because it shows that your partner is physically, emotionally and verbally responsive to your needs. Affection is another quality that Firestone discusses in her article, pointing out that an affectionate partner acknowledges your desire for closeness, and outwardly demonstrates feelings of warmth and tenderness. Fundamentally, affection is a display of love, and if your partner can't show you any, you may need to reevaluate the relationship.

Communication: The Heart of It All

Although the previous three characteristics -- integrity, respect and affection -- are the three most important attributes of a relationship, communication is at the foundation of them all. Whether it's verbal or non-verbal, you can't convey any of them without some form of communication. If you need to hear "I love you," or to receive affection, communicate that with your partner says counseling psychologist Will Meek, in his Psychology Today article, "Universal Relationship Needs." Meek indicates that when your needs aren't met adequately, it could lead to loneliness and depression, so make sure you communicate them precisely.

About the Author

Kimberly Liby has been a content writer and editor since 2006, with articles in "944" magazine. She has written on a range of topics including cooking, health, current events, philosophy, psychology, career, education, writing and editing. Liby holds a Bachelor of Arts in English literature with a writing minor from Arizona State University, and a Master of Science in psychology from the University of Phoenix.

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