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How to Tell Your Boyfriend You Are Very Sorry if He Won't Talk to You?

by Elise Wile

You've really messed up, and now your boyfriend is so angry he won't even look at you -- much less take the time to talk to you. You're genuinely sorry, though, and even if he remains angry, it's still important to you that he at least hear your apology. Fortunately, you have several options at your disposal. Try one or two and see if you can't penetrate the wall built by his hurt feelings.

Social Media Is Quick

Text, email, social media sites -- all of these are easy ways to attempt to convince a truculent boyfriend that he should give you another chance. While your boyfriend may have closed his ears to your verbal pleas for forgiveness, chances are he won't be able to resist peeking at a text or email. To have the most impact, make your apology memorable. Take full responsibility for the action that offended -- making no excuses. In the "Psychology Today" article, "Read This Before You Apologize to Him (or Her), counselors Linda Bloom, L.C.S.W., and Charlie Bloom, M.S.W. note that an apology should never be coercive or manipulative, but seek to repair the damage inflicted. Keeping this in mind, let your boyfriend know that you care about him whether he chooses to forgive you or not.

Snail Mail Lends a Nice Touch

If you want to make more of an impact, send your message via post. Purchase a card or get out some nice stationary, and write your boyfriend a letter letting him know how sorry you are. In your letter, let him know that you are aware that your actions hurt him, and that you wish to make amends. Give it time -- if he doesn't call you the evening after you're certain he's received your missive, note that forgiveness is a process that can take a while, say Linda and Charlie Bloom. Your apology is only the first step in that process.

Send Him a Gift He Won't Forget

If you don't have a way with words, but still want to send the message that you're sorry, consider sending a gift his way. Send a package with that hand-carved pen he admired in a shop, or put together a gift basket with his favorite foods. Include a short note saying that you're sorry. Note that it doesn't hurt to overplay your offense, says professional mediator Laurie Puhn in the CNN.com article, "How to Present the Perfect Apology." Jotting down, "I made a huge mistake," will go a long way towards letting him know you're genuinely sorry.

Be Out-of-the-Box Extravagant!

If you're willing to shell out the cash and don't mind being a bit zany, you can send your boyfriend a singing telegram with your message of contrition. Or, hire a small plane to repeatedly fly by his workplace with the message, "Lloyd, forgive me!" You could have a cake delivered to his home with your sentiment, or send him a dozen roses -- after all, who says flowers are just for women? Your apology will be sure to make an impression that goes beyond mere words.

About the Author

Elise Wile has been a writer since 2003. Holding a master's degree in curriculum and Instruction, she has written training materials for three school districts. Her expertise includes mentoring, serving at-risk students and corporate training.

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