Surprising your husband with sweet gifts and gestures is healthy for your marriage. In fact, couples who make a big deal celebrating good things that happen in their lives -- even if they're little things like finishing a project at work -- tend to have greater intimacy and relationship satisfaction than those who let life become routine, notes sociologist Christine Carter in the Psychology Today article "Enthusiastic Spouses Have Happy Marriages." However, keep in mind that "celebrating" and doing loving things for your husband doesn't mean that you have to break the bank and purchase foreign cigars or whisk him off on a safari trip to Zimbabwe, either. You'll find that small and simple actions can create lots of marital happiness.
Surprise Him with Food
For an unexpected treat, make your husband his favorite sandwich and take it to his office at lunchtime so he can skip the fast food and enjoy homemade deliciousness. At home, bring him breakfast in bed now and then, complete with a cup of freshly brewed coffee. When you're out and about, stop by his favorite bakery and grab one of those bear claws that he likes so much and surprise him with it when he's looking for a nighttime snack. Also, every so often, you can cook his favorite dinner, even if it's the chicken fried steak that's a no-no on your diet. His pleasure will make it worth the extra calories.
Thrill Him with Music
Arrange have a song dedicated to your hubby on his favorite radio station so he'll hear it when he's driving to work. Or, download that new song that was just released by his favorite jazz artist and sneak it into the music folder on his phone. Another idea is to ask him to run an errand with you on a summer evening and wind up at an inexpensive concert in the park instead of the grocery store.
Woo Him with Writing
Tuck a sweet note inside the top pair of underwear in his drawer so that it falls out while he's getting dressed in the morning. Not only will it remind him that you care for him, but it's also likely to give him a good laugh at the start of his day. You can also leave sticky notes for him in his car, on his tablet or even wrapped around the remote so he'll see it when he gets home from work and plops down in front of the evening news. If you don't know what to write, try jotting down a simple "I love you" or sharing lines from a favorite poem or song. If you want to up the surprise factor, use poster board to make a sign that reads something like, "Jeff, you are amazing. Love, Shelley" and tack it to the first telephone pole he'll encounter on his drive to work.
You don't have to give your husband something tangible to thrill him. Surprise him with words of appreciation. It's easy to take a spouse for granted, so make it a point to tell him how proud you are of him when he tells you that his boss complimented him on his work. Thank your husband the next time he fixes something around the house. Tell him how special you think he is for watching your favorite chick flick with you instead of turning on the game. When you focus on what you appreciate in your marriage, you begin to see each other differently, according to the authors of "Making Marriage Simple: 10 Truths for Changing the Relationship You Have Into the One You Want."
- Making Marriage Simple -- 10 Truths for Changing the Relationship You Have Into the One You Want: Harville Hendrix, Ph.D. and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph.D
- Psychology Today: Enthusiastic Spouses Have Happy Marriages
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