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How to Stop Married Flirting

by eHow Contributor

Married flirting' can get people in really big trouble. If you're married to a flirt' then it can also be hard to handle. Worse yet, many people stay in denial and don't want to admit that their spouse is a flirt'. Everybody knows, but it isn't mentioned. Kind of like the elephant in the living room.

Married flirting' is supposed to be taboo, but as we all know it's alive and well. I don't know how many times I've witnessed married men and women flirting' with someone other than their spouse. The worst part is that some of them do it with their spouse sitting right there beside them. It shocks me every time; I've even had them flirt' with me and their wife being my friend. It's hard to deal with married flirting', especially when you're the one they're flirting' with. What do you do? Ignore, confront or deny and let it continue.

If your spouse is a flirt' and you know it and it bothers you, which it should. The first thing you do is talk to them about it. In other words, confrontation, so that they know you know. Be prepared for them to lie and deny this is normal. Getting upset about their lying and denying won't help matters either. In fact, it can make the situation worse so stay calm and hold your peace. Whatever you do don't create a big scene when you see it going down. Instead do something smart like ask a friend to go over there and interrupt. Then you go over and gracefully make your presence known. If you don't know the person introduce yourself as the wife/husband and smile.

Then later when you and your spouse are alone and in a good mood have your talk. Timing is important and you need to approach it tactfully without anger. Tell them how it makes you feel which could be embarrassed, hurt, disrespected etc. Do not accuse, use guilt trips, blame or manipulate. Many times this will be enough to stop married flirting', however, if it doesn't then the next step is to suggest counseling. If they refuse to seek help you may need a trial separation to let them know you mean business. Do not allow flirting' to blatantly continue while you suffer silently.

More often than not when a person has a flirt' for a spouse it makes them feel very insecure like they're not attractive enough or else he/she wouldn't want these other people etc. Therefore, the longer you let it go the worse you get while they happily flirt' away unaffected. There is no excuse that is acceptable for flirting' when you're married. Sometimes people use the lame excuse of being drunk. The answer to this is they need to stop drinking if they can't control themselves. Lastly, don't listen to people who tell you married flirting' isn't anything to worry about and to let it go. Flirting' is a stepping stone to cheating.

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