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How to Start a Long-Distance Relationship

by Remy Lo

Is distance the only thing that’s stopping you from having a meaningful relationship with the girl or guy of your dreams? Starting a long distance relationship in the proper way can help remove the stigmas associated with the endeavor. It’s time to stop making excuses and attempt to have the relationship you deserve.

Make sure a long distance relationship is something you’re ready to try. While all relationships require serious time and commitment, long distance relationships require more effort and planning to be successful. Simple plans like a Friday night date become complex plans when heavy gas mileage or plane tickets are involved. Your significant other may not be able to attend many special events with you or even be present for your birthday. Take these factors into consideration before diving into this complex commitment.

Tell your love interest about your desire to start a long distance relationship. Pick a mutually comfortable time to discuss your romantic ideal. Remember that there is a real difference between casual conversations and committing yourself to someone who lives miles away from you. Give your love interest time to process and evaluate your request. Avoid rushing him into a decision. This conversation may need to take place over several sessions in order to be properly conveyed and interpreted.

Discuss the pitfalls of long distance relationships with your love interest. There’s no need to pretend that long distance relationships are easy to maintain. This is the time to get a feel for each other’s views on the subject as well as discuss any prior experience that may benefit your endeavor. Be honest about any fears or insecurities relating to the amount of physical distance in the relationship.

Establish the terms of your relationship. Take the time to discuss your expectations regarding the level of relationship you’d like to commit to. Define what cheating means in the context of your long distance relationship. It is important to know whether attending a movie or special event with an opposite sex friend will cause a rift in the relationship. This is the time to define what your relationship will be made of so don’t rush the process or attempt to make the relationship into more than what either of you means for it to be.

Make the commitment to contact each other on a regular basis. Since you won’t be able to see each other in person most of the time, both of you must make a determined effort to keep your relationship up to date and honest. Consider setting aside special days or times to contact each other. Use all available contact methods including phone, internet, and snail mail to vary your interactions.

Tip

  • Although long distance relationships are difficult to start, they are not impossible to manage.

Warning

  • Failing to communicate with your partner on a regular basis can be a long distance relationship deal breaker.

About the Author

Remy Lo has been a freelance writer since 2002. He covers a wide range of topics, from politics to personal improvement, and has been published in a literary magazine and several websites.