If you feel as if something is missing from your marriage, the worst thing to do is wait for your husband to fix it. He may have no idea that there is a problem. Take the initiative and try showing your husband more respect. Everyone needs a refresher. Showing your husband respect may give him that boost he needs to appreciate you more and treat you how you want to be treated.
Start with a compliment. It sounds simple, but a genuine compliment has the power to lift spirits and change viewpoints. If you commit yourself to look for at least one thing each day that your husband does right, you will feel better about him, and he about you. And the more you do it, the easier it becomes. You can compliment his looks, humor, or for being a great dad. Whatever you choose, just make sure it comes from the heart. He may even follow your lead.
Be less critical. Don't correct your husband on every mistake he makes. This doesn't mean that you don't have the right to state your opinion. Just make sure that your opinion is worth sharing. If it's something very important to you, find a polite way to express yourself. If it's a minor point, let it go. Taking the critical approach only hurts you both. It makes him feel like you are treating him like a child and it makes you feel like a nag. Don't sweat the small stuff.
Relax. Many women straddle the dual responsibilities of breadwinner and homemaker. It's no wonder you'd be too stressed to relax. So when he offers to do something, let him. Your husband may not do everything exactly how you would, but that doesn't make it wrong. It makes it different. Even if he does something "wrong," he'll learn from the mistake. And don't be afraid to ask for help. Give yourself a moment to unwind and let him take on more responsibility and bragging rights for helping out. It's a win-win situation.
Watch what you say in front of the kids. If an argument is unavoidable, have enough respect for your kids and your husband to make sure that you have a private discussion. Children follow their parents' lead, so they need to see mommy and daddy as a team of people who are respectful to one another. If you belittle your husband in front of them, they will follow suit and the same would be the case if your husband disrespected you in front of the children. This is definitely a huge rule to be wary of, and even though tempers may be high, when they settle down, your husband will notice this act of respect.
Take an interest in the things he likes. He may be really into his job, sports, or some other hobby or activity that you might find boring. But if you want him to take an interest in your pastimes, try to take notice of his. Ask questions about it, or support him with books or paraphernalia that you know he would like. Bonding with him on something he enjoys is a very effective way to really make a connection. Taking the time to understand his joys is a wonderful way to get to know him on a deeper level.
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