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How to Get Over Thoughts of Jealousy

by Kristen Moutria

If thoughts of jealousy are plaguing your life, it may be time to take a step back and ask yourself why you are constantly comparing yourself to others. Dr. Jo Anne White says in an article on "WebMD" that jealousy reflects your view of yourself, demonstrating that you are not truly confident in who you are. Instead of letting jealousy control you, take a few simple steps to overcome it and be grateful for who you are, what you have and what you can do.

Be Honest with Yourself

Dr. Raj Raghunathan notes on "Psychology Today" that the first step to get over thoughts of jealousy is to be honest about the fact that you feel inferior to the person you are comparing yourself to. Pushing your jealousy aside or acting as if it is not there will only prevent you from overcoming it and developing the self-confidence you need to be happy. Instead, be honest with yourself about who you are jealous of, why you are jealous of that person and what insecurities you have that are causing you to feel envious.

Build Yourself Up

If you are struggling with jealousy, your insecurity is likely the root cause. Dr. White notes that if you have a poor self-image, you may be tempted to compare yourself to someone else. Furthermore, you may feel as if you have nothing to offer to keep someone interested in getting to know you. Instead of letting your insecurities define you, focus on what makes you unique, whether it be a talent you have, an exceptional personality trait or a rare ability. Focusing on your positive traits will keep your mind off of what you lack and give your self-confidence a boost.

Do Your Best

Therese J. Borchard reports on "PsychCentral" that doing your best is the most effective weapon you have against envy. When you are tempted to wish you had abilities you do not, or dream about looking a certain way, realize that you can only work with what you have. Even if you are jealous of a certain person's abilities, you can only do your best and learn to accept that as enough. The key to overcoming jealous thoughts is to make the decision to accept who you are and to recognize your limitations.

Stop Comparing Yourself

Dr. Keith Ablow notes on "WebMD" that being jealous of the good things your friend has only makes you aware of the fact that you do not have them. You may ask yourself what is wrong with you, or what you have done that has caused someone else to have something you do not. Instead of looking at another person's gifts or opportunities, focus on being thankful for what you have. If you do not entertain thoughts of jealousy, they will not overcome you.

Resources

  • Overcoming Jealousy and Possessiveness; Paul A. Hauck

About the Author

Kristen Moutria has a Bachelor of Arts in psychology from Evangel University. She is currently pursuing her Master of Arts in education from the University of Nebraska.

Photo Credits

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