A bad break-up can be the cause of incredible anger and heartache. You might feel that you just can't live without your guy and that he was meant for you. You're feeling insecure, weak and depressed, but by appearing confident, strong and happy, you may have a chance to rekindle the romance, and by committing to nurture your relationship, you can have the connection you desire.
Getting Your Man Back
Take a break from the relationship. Time apart will allow you both to cool off, evaluate your emotions and decrease intensity when you do reconnect. Talking about the split too soon can cause you to say things you don't mean. Also, if you call and text him incessantly, he'll think you're desperate and stay away.
Be self-confident. Look beautiful. Get dressed up, put on makeup and get your hair done. Look and feel like a superstar even though the break-up is painful. Your man will notice, and he'll be more attracted to a secure, beautiful you.
Be yourself. Your man doesn't want someone just like him; he wants a fascinating, intriguing person with her own interests and insight. Do things you enjoy and focus on your hobbies. Learn to do something new, such as painting or skiing. Research world history, African animals or other things you are interested in. Taking time for yourself will make you happier, more self-confident and, therefore, more desirable. Don't wait around for him to call or break plans with friends in order to be with him. Keeping your plans will let him know that your life is moving on as it should and you're not waiting around for him.
Wait a month or two for any leftover break-up tension to decrease and look for signs of interest. He may give you that sweet smile you remember or go out of his way to have a conversation with you.
Ask him out. Make it casual and take him out for a drink or coffee. Keep your emotions under control on this mini-date and don't be too forward. Try to avoid talking about the failures of your recent relationship and just enjoy your time together. Compliment him, flirt and talk to him the way you did when your relationship began. Take care not to appear desperate to get him back and avoid getting too physical.
Talk about your break-up, when you become close again, if necessary. Admit your faults and apologize for the things you did wrong. Don't pass the blame: begin statements with "I" instead of "you" to avoid nagging him. Keep the conversation as light and short as possible and don't beg him for a second chance.
Give him more space, if necessary, and wait for him to make the next move. Texting, calling, checking up on him through friends and stopping by his house will make you seem desperate. He needs time to process his feelings for you.
Recall the beginning of your relationship. Remember why you fell in love with him in the first place and remind him why he was attracted to you. Be spontaneous and take time to enjoy each other. Become interested in something he enjoys. You may find a new hobby and an excuse to spend more time together.
Communicate with him. Share your needs and feelings. Avoid controlling words and behaviors; don't keep him from his friends or stop him from doing what he wants to do. Be simple and direct when you want or need something; ask him for help with housework or to pick his dirty socks up off the floor. Men don't always see what needs to be done so he might need some gentle prodding.
Appreciate him. Thank him often for everything, from taking out the trash to an expensive dinner. Notice when he does something sweet. Compliment him and stroke his ego.
Show affection and share intimacy. Emotional support, kind words and physical pleasure go a long way in strengthening a relationship.
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