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How to Keep the Spark Alive in Your Relationship of Three Years

by Christa Orion

No one wants to say goodbye to those feelings of lust and desire that are present in the beginning of a relationship. Maintaining that spark between yourself and your partner after three years can take work, but it certainly can be done. Monotony can be avoided by paying your relationship the attention it deserves.

Speak Up

Small compliments can go a long way.

Sometimes the simplest statements can have the largest results. "You are so beautiful," and "Your eyes still take my breath away," are both statements that can arouse feelings of love that may have been lost. A simple reminder of the attraction that exists between you and your partner can bring back that desire in your relationship that is so important to its success. If you are thinking something positive about your loved one, say it! Complimenting is such a small action that can make a huge difference.

Little Things

Surprises add spice to a relationship.

It is not uncommon for couples to get into a certain routine. Talking about the same topics, going to the same places, and doing the same things can lead to a predictable and unexciting life together. Take some initiative by adding a few unexpected surprises into the mix. Let him know you are thinking about him. Cook her favorite dish for a nice night at home together. Buy him a pair of tickets to his favorite team's game. The little things you do for each other add up romantically.

Communicate

Take time for small talk

Whether it be an hour a night or on your breaks at work, make time to talk to your partner. Communication is vital to the health of any relationship. Couples should spend ten to fifteen minutes a day engaging in small talk, researchers at Utah State University insist in the article, "Communication, Conflict & Commitment." Small talk can be about anything you feel like expressing. These mini conversations can really contribute to the sharing of common interests and keeping up with the feelings and enjoyment of your partner.

Make New Memories

Have fun together.

When you reminisce about the last couple of years in your relationship, what do you remember? If you are thinking of the countless nights of dinner, bath, and bed, then it is time to make a change. Get out of the house and find new activities to do with your partner. Grab a football and head to the nearest park for a day in the sun. Plan a trip to the mountains. Regardless of your hobbies, adding some exciting new experiences into the mix will keep those feelings of boredom at bay. "Intimate Relationships," an article published on pbs.org, states that continued work at maintaining long-term, quality relationships will prove to have lasting results on your health and overall happiness.

About the Author

Christa Orion is a psychologist in training with focus on family and relationship health. She has years of experience working with individuals going through domestic issues.

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