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First Date Tips for Divorced Dads

by Christie Hartman, studioD

The first date is an ideal time to get to know a woman and see if there’s enough of a connection to warrant another date. If you like her, naturally you want the date to go well, increasing your chances of getting a second date. At the same time, when you have kids, you have a few more considerations when you decide to take a woman out. Following a few guidelines should make the first date go successfully.

Keep It Simple

As a single dad, you probably have to watch your finances. After all, soccer games, ballet lessons, and college tuition cost money. Fortunately, the days of fancy or expensive first dates are over. If you meet a woman online, it’s perfectly acceptable to meet her for a quick coffee or drink. If you already know her, lunch at a cute café or a fun pizza place won’t set you back much. Save the pricier dates for women you’re serious about.

Plan Ahead

Between work and raising kids without the help of a partner, single dads have a lot going on. It can be difficult to squeeze in time for a date or find a reliable babysitter to watch the kids. Thus, a little planning is necessary. Try to schedule the date when you know the kids will be at their mom’s house. Or, plan to meet her for lunch at a place near your office, while the kids are at school.

Be Up Front

If your date doesn’t already know you have kids, make sure you mention that on the date. Tell her a little about your kids: their ages, their sex, and how often they live with you. This shows her that your kids are an important part of your life and lets her know more about your situation. However, avoid talking too much about your kids on the first date. A woman wants to know about you first.

Avoid Heavy Topics

As a single dad, you’ve been through a divorce and have on ongoing co-parenting relationship with your ex. While it’s perfectly fine to tell a woman how long you’ve been divorced or that you share custody of the kids, avoid talking about your divorce or ex-wife. These topics are too heavy for a first date and can scare women away. Instead, talk about your work, your hobbies, or other light topics, and save the more serious subjects for women you get involved with.

About the Author

Christie Hartman is a psychologist and author of five dating and relationship books. She has written for several online publications and has been published in numerous scientific journals in the areas of mental health and addiction. Christie earned her master’s and doctoral degrees from the University of Colorado.

Photo Credits

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