Whether in the dating arena or life in general, appearing self-confident can help you get ahead. Friends and potential daters will respond more positively to your enthusiastic and can-do attitude, and new opportunities will open up for you in your personal and work life. If you lack confidence around men and want to exude it in your daily life, several strategies can boost your attitude and appearance.
Wear a Smile
Smiling is a simple step that communicates to men that you are happy with yourself and the world around you. When you smile, you let others know that you are approachable and willing to mingle, suggests professional matchmaker J. Cameron Gantt in the Your Tango article, "4 Tricks to Exude Confidence and Attract More Dates." On the other hand, scowling can turn people away, while a neutral expression can make you appear preoccupied or uninterested.
Slow Things Down
When you rush through life with jerky movements and fast talk, you appear nervous and easily frazzled. Instead, slow things down. For example, talk at a steady pace, paying attention to your breathing and pausing when necessary, suggests Gantt. You can also apply this strategy to your body language. If you feel jittery, move slower and focus on your breathing. Deep, slow breaths will increase your sense of calm.
Be Open to New Things
Step out of your comfort zone and try new things, suggests licensed clinical social worker Maud Purcell in the PsychCentral article, "The Self-Confidence Formula for Women." For example, don't be afraid to try cooking a new dish or playing a new game in front of others. Even if you fail at something, your willingness to try new things will communicate your self-confidence in front of men. Don't get flustered at failures. Smile, make a joke and resolve to do better next time.
Don't Focus on Self-Doubt
Being socially open can make you appear at ease, but when you feel insecure, it can be hard to make small talk out of fear of embarrassment. The key to overcoming a tied tongue is to focus on the man in front of you, suggests general internist Alex Lickerman in the Psychology Today article, "How To Overcome Shyness." Ask the man questions, listen and then either relate or ask him to elaborate. By placing your full attention on the man, you escape your self-doubting thoughts and learn to live in the present.
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