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How to Discipline a 10-Year-Old Daughter

by Tiffany Raiford

Effectively disciplining your 10-year-old daughter for inappropriate behavior can be the catalyst for a happy household. It might occasionally be tempting to allow her to get away with acting out of sorts, but being inconsistent with discipline will teach her that she's not always accountable for her actions. Having a firm list of rules and consequences is one way to discipline your 10-year-old daughter, although using natural consequences as discipline is often the most effective method, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics.

Stop shouldering the responsibility for your daughter’s mistakes. According to the website Kids Health, it’s a natural reaction for you to want to protect her and see that nothing happens to her, but she will not learn if you continue to take the responsibility for her. For example, if she neglects to work on her science project and remembers at bedtime that it’s due the next day, you shouldn’t stay up working on the project for her. Allow your 10-year-old daughter to take responsibility for her actions. Experiencing the embarrassment of having to explain to her teacher that she forgot to do the project and having a bad grade is often enough to teach your 10-year-old daughter not to be so irresponsible in the future.

Discipline your 10-year-old daughter with natural consequences for her actions. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, natural consequences are the natural results of poor behavior. For example, say your 10-year-old daughter wants to wear her favorite shirt to a school function and asks you to wash it. However, instead of putting it in the laundry as you require, she leaves it on her bedroom floor, knowing that the household rule is that you don’t wash it if it’s not in the laundry basket. When the function comes, her favorite shirt will be dirty and she won’t be able to wear it, which for most 10-year-old girls is a big punishment.

Create a list of consequences that coincide with the nature and the severity of the misbehavior your 10-year-old daughter is projecting, according to the American Humane Association. For example, if your daughter insists on leaving her books, music or toys all over the house rather than putting them away, as the house rules state, take them away from her for a proscribed period of time. When you let her know that ignoring this rule means you will take away whatever it is she left out, she is more likely to pick up her belongings when she is finished with them. Few 10-year-old girls want to lose their favorite books or music for the entire weekend because they left them lying around.

Tip

  • Do not expect immediate results from your discipline. Sometimes it takes a bad grade, or lost privileges or the loss of a favorite possession once or twice to instill in your 10-year-old daughter’s mind that not following the rules means she loses out.

Warning

  • Avoid physical abuse at all costs. According to the American Humane Association, physical abuse does nothing to teach your daughter how to behave, it only teaches her to fear you, it gives her anxiety and it makes her more aggressive toward her peers.

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