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How to Deal With a Husband That Won't Stand Up to His Family

by Natalie Chardonnet

It's frustrating when your husband doesn't stand up to his family for you. You may feel betrayed, hurt, annoyed or angry, all of which are completely normal emotions. Discussing the problem and possible solutions with your husband is the first step for resolving the situation.

Arrange a time to talk privately with your husband. Do so when neither of you will be stressed out and when there are no distractions such as television, children or friends.

Tell your husband why you are angry. Write your examples down, if necessary, so that you can remember them. Stay calm when discussing your emotions and avoid name-calling, yelling or foul language, all of which will cause stress and anger.

Ask your husband for his point of view. He may have been oblivious to his family's slights of you or their behavior. He could also have been ignoring the problem. If you discuss the situation rationally, this is his time to share his opinion and fix the situation.

Make a plan with your husband for dealing with his family. The situation must be decided by both of you because marriage is a team effort. Decide how the two of you will handle your husband's family in a respectful, responsible manner the next time there is an issue. You may want to come up with a cue that both of you will recognize in case there is a problem.

Understand that the only behavior you can control is your own, and act with kindness and respect every time you see your husband's family. Don't pressure your husband to cut family ties, which will undoubtedly cause stress and put a strain on your marriage.

About the Author

Natalie Chardonnet began writing in 2006, specializing in art, history, museums and travel. In 2010, she presented a paper on those subjects at the National Conference of Undergraduate Research. Chardonnet has a Bachelor of Arts in art history and a minor in Italian studies from Truman State University, in addition to a certificate in French from Ifalpes University in Chambery, France.

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