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How to Choose a Mate According to the Bible

by Andrea Hermitt

Choosing a mate with the same beliefs as you can be quite difficult. In the Christian and Jewish religions, it is wise to choose a mate according to what is set forth in the Bible to help insure a good match for your values. Here are steps on how to choose a mate according to the Bible.

Choosing a Mate According to the Bible

Stop looking for a mate. Trying too hard to find a mate may cause you to overlook the person God has set before you. If you go about living your life and serving God and others, you will eventually meet a compatible person with the same values as yourself. Proverbs 19:14 says, “House and wealth are an inheritance from fathers, But a prudent wife is from the Lord." The lord will provide your mate at the right time.

Trust the instincts of your parents and/or elders in your church. If people who truly want the best for you have reservations that they can clearly express, you should think twice before attaching yourself to a person they think is wrong for you. At the very least, you should seriously consider the behaviors and characteristics they are concerned about.

Do not choose an unbeliever for a mate. 2 Corinthians 6:14 says “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness?”

Look past physical attractiveness. While it is the outward beauty of a person, that often attracts us to them, you must be able to look past that beauty and look into the heart of the person. The Bible warns us that beautiful people can sometimes have poor values and be difficult to get along with. You need to make sure that the person you marry is beautiful on the inside as well.

Look at their character traits. The book of Proverbs clearly lays the traits of a Godly wife. In short, they should be Godly, fearful of the Lord, wise, honoring to their spouse, gracious and faithful. Proverbs also lists the traits of a Godly husband which are compassion, honesty, hard-working, truthful, have self control, have a gentle tongue, wise and able to listen to counsel, have integrity, be faithful, be forgiving, willing to admit wrongs, be humble, a peacemaker, avoid excesses, be charitable, keep confidences, obedient to God, not a jealous man and finally, has a positive outlook on life.

Items you will need
  • Bible

About the Author

Andrea Hermitt is an artist and writer who loves to research and write about new things. She's been a content writer since 2000, contributing to Families.com, the blog Notes From A Homeschooling Mom and other online publications. Hermitt has a Bachelor of Arts in fine art and English from the State University of New York at Albany.