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How to Act with Your Boyfriend Around His Parents

by Lucie Westminster, studioD

It is nerve-wracking when you and your boyfriend spend time with his parents. Regardless of how long you two have been dating, you want his parents to genuinely like and approve of you. Parents may be skeptical of the person their son is dating, but by taking a few simple steps, you are more likely to find them loving you rather than convincing their son he can do better.

Respect the beliefs and wishes of your boyfriend's parents even if you and your boyfriend don't share those beliefs. For example, if his parents don't curse and you do, refrain from doing so in their presence. Use your judgement and avoid controversial comments and behaviors that could offend his parents.

Demonstrate to his family how happy the two of you are. Few things please parents more than seeing their children enjoy themselves. Talk about the adventurous hike you two recently completed or your upcoming plans to volunteer at a soup kitchen. Without going overboard or being fake, smile and be positive. In addition, let them know what a good person their son is and how much he has enriched your life.

Be mindful of topics for discussion. Avoid talking about your latest all-nighter or the recent wild party at your friend's house. There is a difference between hiding your activities and flaunting them, and it's important to be mindful of this when in the presence of your boyfriend's parents.

Save the kissing and flirting until the family is not around. This isn't the time to show each other how much you romantically care for one another. Instead, save it for when you two are alone. Doing so shows his parents that you respect both them and their son.


  • Talk to your boyfriend about any idiosyncratic behavior that may be unique to his parents. If, for example, they are extremely annoyed by women who wear short skirts, save that cute skimpy dress for another time.

About the Author

Based in Texas, Lucie Westminster has been a writer and researcher since 1975. Her work has been published in journals such as "Psychological Reports" and "Journal of Verbal Learning and Verbal Behavior." Westminster's interests include developmental psychology, children, pets and crafting. She holds a Ph.D. in psychology from Miami University.

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